Late winter in deciduous woodland. The air is damp, the light is flat, the trees remain stark and skeletal. Here, in a lichen-laden copse, stand a Husband-and-Wife, permanently rooted to the spot. Initially two separate trees, with separate boles on either side of a small rivulet, and presumably with separate root systems, they have joined together in dendrological wedlock at a height of about 20 feet.
A branch from one appears to have naturally grafted itself onto the main trunk of the other, a type of woody kiss called inosculation. Whilst such H-trees can be artificially encouraged, their spontaneous formation is a touchingly rare piece of dendro-topology. 
In fact, alphabetic topology seems to be very much the order of the day, with McLaren's new F-duct causing something of a stir at the first race of the 2010 Formula One season, in Bahrain. It transpires that the air entering this duct flows into the cockpit, from whence it somehow influences the flow feeding the rear wing, and in a manner which can be controlled by the driver. 
Perhaps there is a pipe leading from the F-duct into the driver's rectum, from which point the air flows up through the gastro-intestinal tract of our gallant pilote, out of his helmet, and thence on to the rear wing. The driver is thereby able to stall the wing, and reduce drag down the straights, by the simple expedient of relaxing his lower jaw. However, he does then have to remember to keep his mouth shut in the corners, as well as in the press conferences.
1 comment:
I think it might be something to do with Vodafone being the sponsors. Apparently the next gen of mobiles will be able to be controlled by hand gestures.
Ron was driving down the road thinking about this and saw Max walking on the pavement, giving him the "shaking hand" as he drove past, an idea was born.
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